


hope

by dexd_poets



Category: Dead Poets Society (1989)
Genre: Abusive Parents, Angst, Sad Ending, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 20:42:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29955615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dexd_poets/pseuds/dexd_poets
Summary: just a poem i decided to write after rewatching dead poets.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	hope

**Author's Note:**

> please don't read if you're in a troubled mental state right now! i want you all to be safe! <3

hope

such a strong word

to some it was meaningless 

to others it was everything 

and to him, it was..

releasing

he had held his breath for so long

had been taken under the current

always seeing the top, felt the warm sun glow on his skin

but he was never strong enough to break through

water cascading down his face as he could finally breathe

but then he saw something

reaching out and pulling, pulling, pulling

a hand, a soft hand that fit into his like a missing puzzle piece 

he didn't know that it was missing until it found him

todd was his name; is his name

todd with his beautiful brown eyes that, when in the right lighting, shone like embers blazing with charcoal and ash

sometimes there would be a vast sea of emotions swirling in those eyes and he wanted to make them stop

stop the feeling that gripped so hard at todd's guts, he couldn't speak, couldn't breathe 

it was morose; a word he learned in mr. keating's class

sometimes he felt like todd, too

felt like he couldn't breathe, speak

it usually happened when his father told him he couldn't do something, which he did often

he was tired of it, had no control over his life

his chest would swell with this.. this feeling; it reminded him of dread.. or-..or fear 

fear and dread for the future

he had no hope

but then there was this book

and mr keating told them about a club he was in

it made him hopeful

he read it and the words tugged at his heart until it bled out all over the pages, smearing everywhere and staining everything 

so he joined a play

he would have the lead part

and he practiced his lines so so hard; so very hard

his father would be proud

but he wasn't 

he was told he couldn't be in the play

and that hope that had once filled him drained, leaving him hollow with dead, cold eyes

but he lied

he lied so many times

"my father will be gone for four days,"

"i talked to him, and he said yes to the play,"

"as long as my grades were well."

he lied

lied

lied

lied

he lied to himself so many times

"i'm fine,"

"it's tough love,"

"he loves me."

but does he?

did he?

he wouldn't know

wouldn't remember 

because suddenly

there was something cold pressed to his temple 

and he felt calm

the snow outside filled his lungs with ice, even with all of the windows closed and the heat blaring

his bare chest stilled

and his hand fell

he was hopeful now

hopeful that maybe, just maybe

his dreams would come true in heaven

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! leave a comment and kudos if you'd like!


End file.
